This has been one of the busiest seasons in the life of our family and ministry. And as we do more in the lives of our children, our church, and community, it seems so easy to fail to communicate effectively or in a timely manner. The interesting thing that I am learning is that as I put off focusing on communicating better, the more stressed I become and the more appologies I have to make.
Why? I am reminded that our lives are about glorifying God (for certain), but they are not lived or lived out on an island. But rather, they are lived out with and through other people. I have to do a better job.
All week, last week, I knew that I needed to confirm the use of our neighborhood building for a small group fellowship...and then communicate that to the people who were going to be a part of our small groups. However, I kept putting off locating the number to call, and did not do it until Saturday night. Sunday morning, I made a quick announcement, put out a sign-up sheet, and was a bit dissappointed when only 2 families signed-up. That was not the big 'ahah' moment. It was when one family called at 6:00 p.m. and wondered where we were meeting. (We weren't until next Friday.) Another family called as well. I really blew it.
The really sad part is that this was not the only blunder for the week. So I am confessing that I will do better...because people matter. It even forced me to clarify a few things within our family last night about our week. Heaven help us to communicate and not to procrastinate. If you think we think we are too busy to communicate effectively, the reality is that we are too busy to communicate with anything less than full effort.
Monday, June 2, 2008
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Flood From the Past
It seems like such a long time ago that Hurricane Katrina survivors came to Greenville and our church had such an opportunity to hear their stories and minister to them in our city. Today, I spent day 3 hanging sheet rock / drywall in a home still devastated by the storm...and a family still living (almost 3 years later) in a small FEMA trailor in their front yard.
Yes, I'm in New Orleans with 3 guys from our church and 7 guys from 7 other churches working through the NOAH rebuild project. Today, we met Leavy...a 70 year old woman who has been living 3 hours away until her home is repaired. When given a small gift card to Home Depot by our group, she asked if she could make a donation to our church...not your common response.
We also met Kimberly...a single mom who just moved back into her home 2 weeks ago with her daughter. Some guys from the team drywalled her home a year ago. She invited us over to see the results. What a long journey home.
In our group devotions tonight, we were reminded that our sacrifice to come here (including that of our families) is only for a week...then we will go back to our regular routines. But these people are still dealing with the physical, spiritual, and emotional storms from this tragic flood.
I was reminded of how our family live through the great flood of Hurricane Floyd some years back in North Carolina and the damage that is still visible there. The memories of feeding trailors and Baptist disaster relief workers has come back so vividly.
Events often leave scars in our lives, not just the physical storms, but also the relationship storms. And if we are to look, we can see the devistation all around us. Some people need help to move out of the FEMA trailor to which they have been confined for so long and back home again. Not back to the same old home...but to one that has been touched by the hand of God. And often that happens through the lifting and attaching of a piece of fresh drywall by a willing servant of the Master...maybe like you and me.
Yes, I'm in New Orleans with 3 guys from our church and 7 guys from 7 other churches working through the NOAH rebuild project. Today, we met Leavy...a 70 year old woman who has been living 3 hours away until her home is repaired. When given a small gift card to Home Depot by our group, she asked if she could make a donation to our church...not your common response.
We also met Kimberly...a single mom who just moved back into her home 2 weeks ago with her daughter. Some guys from the team drywalled her home a year ago. She invited us over to see the results. What a long journey home.
In our group devotions tonight, we were reminded that our sacrifice to come here (including that of our families) is only for a week...then we will go back to our regular routines. But these people are still dealing with the physical, spiritual, and emotional storms from this tragic flood.
I was reminded of how our family live through the great flood of Hurricane Floyd some years back in North Carolina and the damage that is still visible there. The memories of feeding trailors and Baptist disaster relief workers has come back so vividly.
Events often leave scars in our lives, not just the physical storms, but also the relationship storms. And if we are to look, we can see the devistation all around us. Some people need help to move out of the FEMA trailor to which they have been confined for so long and back home again. Not back to the same old home...but to one that has been touched by the hand of God. And often that happens through the lifting and attaching of a piece of fresh drywall by a willing servant of the Master...maybe like you and me.
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Coming Home
It seems as if the older I get (now passing the 40 mark), the more often my trips home to Ohio are marked by funerals. On Thursday my older brother and I had the privilege to conduct the funeral of our last remaining grandmother. And all of the things that we tell people in our ministries literally have to be proven in our response to death in our own family.
I was once again reminded of the impact of what many would consider a very insignificant life. My grandmother lived 'up the hollow' in a farm house a few miles from where she grew up. She never had a driver's license, but seemed to know about everyone in town. And when the memorial service was about to begin, the funeral director had to get more chairs as it was a standing room only crowd. Nearly everyone there had been affected by this life and family in a significant way.
Leave it to a funeral to bring out the best and worst in a family...but all we got to see was the best. So many friends told us how proud my grandma (Nonnie) was of us grandchildren and how she was always speaking a kind word about us to her friends. But I think the most moving thing that happened was seeing our usually 'less than affectionate' grandfather (now 86), walk up to the casket time and again to pat her hand and say some of the most beautiful words.
Life seems to keep us so busy that I saw family members that I had not seen in at least 10-15 years. We get so engaged in our lives and families that our trips 'coming home' are now few and far between. However, when we come for these sacred occasions, there seems to be less small talk. The conversations seem to quickly turn to what really matters. I'm not sure why that does not happen more often...but funerals seem to bring out the urgency and brevity in life.
This morning, the phone rang early telling us that my grandmother's sister experienced the death of her husband during the night...so there will be another memorial service before I return to South Carolina next week. I guess it is now just the reality of coming home.
I was once again reminded of the impact of what many would consider a very insignificant life. My grandmother lived 'up the hollow' in a farm house a few miles from where she grew up. She never had a driver's license, but seemed to know about everyone in town. And when the memorial service was about to begin, the funeral director had to get more chairs as it was a standing room only crowd. Nearly everyone there had been affected by this life and family in a significant way.
Leave it to a funeral to bring out the best and worst in a family...but all we got to see was the best. So many friends told us how proud my grandma (Nonnie) was of us grandchildren and how she was always speaking a kind word about us to her friends. But I think the most moving thing that happened was seeing our usually 'less than affectionate' grandfather (now 86), walk up to the casket time and again to pat her hand and say some of the most beautiful words.
Life seems to keep us so busy that I saw family members that I had not seen in at least 10-15 years. We get so engaged in our lives and families that our trips 'coming home' are now few and far between. However, when we come for these sacred occasions, there seems to be less small talk. The conversations seem to quickly turn to what really matters. I'm not sure why that does not happen more often...but funerals seem to bring out the urgency and brevity in life.
This morning, the phone rang early telling us that my grandmother's sister experienced the death of her husband during the night...so there will be another memorial service before I return to South Carolina next week. I guess it is now just the reality of coming home.
Monday, February 11, 2008
Praise You In The Storm
There is a popular contemporary song playing regularly on the radio by this title. For me, this has been the season of watching people do exactly that. In 3 years as a church planter, I do not think that I have witnessed so much struggle with physical, emotional, financial, and relational circumstances. Yet in the midst of many questions and tears, I am watching most people in my circle praise through them.
Sometimes it is difficult to speak a word of encouragement, while at other times it seems as if just being there is what is needed. Sometimes, a physical act of a hug or being used to help provide for a need or convenience. But one thing is for sure, it is difficult to watch people you love go through difficulties...while it is a real blessing to watch the praise in the midst of that storm.
A lady at the bank asked me the other day if difficulties in her life were spiritual battles or just a part of the human experience. After some thought on an appropriate answer in this public lobby, I answered, "Yes". I am learning that some of our struggles are just the normal course of living in a decaying body and in a sinful world, while others are a direct battle to see whom we will worship.
I know that the battle for our worship is not passive. And whether or not all of the struggles I am facing or watching others face are the result of 'life' or 'war', the reality is that God's grace is so proving enough to keep us glorifying the Creator right in the middle of the storm.
Sometimes it is difficult to speak a word of encouragement, while at other times it seems as if just being there is what is needed. Sometimes, a physical act of a hug or being used to help provide for a need or convenience. But one thing is for sure, it is difficult to watch people you love go through difficulties...while it is a real blessing to watch the praise in the midst of that storm.
A lady at the bank asked me the other day if difficulties in her life were spiritual battles or just a part of the human experience. After some thought on an appropriate answer in this public lobby, I answered, "Yes". I am learning that some of our struggles are just the normal course of living in a decaying body and in a sinful world, while others are a direct battle to see whom we will worship.
I know that the battle for our worship is not passive. And whether or not all of the struggles I am facing or watching others face are the result of 'life' or 'war', the reality is that God's grace is so proving enough to keep us glorifying the Creator right in the middle of the storm.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Lessons from a Simple Life
Lesa and I received a call late Tuesday evening that Lesa's grandmother's long fought physical battle had ended as God decided that Marie Harding had finished her course here on earth. Her life on earth ended without much fanfare, nor (thankfully) with much physical pain.
We also learned that Mrs. Harding had requested that I do her funeral service, so we have been making plans for Lesa and I to travel to NE Ohio for the service. The burden that Lesa senses for her family and for her father's health (who is still recovering from a stroke and open heart surgery) is apparent. And I am sure that the flow of memories, including canning peaches in Grandma's kitchen and running to the outhouse at the last second, will increase in the coming days. We are glad that our last visit to Ohio included a rare instance of what seemed to be coherant conversation with Grandma at the nursing home where she lived the past year or so.
As I have prayed this morning and read God's Word, the thoughts that come to my mind seem to focus on the fact of how a simple, yet faithful person who lived in a home without an indoor toilet until the late 1980's could have a profound impact on the world. As I have tried to come to a personal summary of my perception of this wonderful lady's legacy, it is wrapped up in the first 30 seconds of any conversation that anyone ever had with her. If you were to greet her with a hug and ask her how she was doing, within 5 seconds the conversation would ALWAYS be turned to the you...and she was genuinely interested.
She was always asking when we might be able to come and visit. But it was not in a way as other family members might ask. It was never laden with guilt for not being there more often, but you sensed a genuine desire to be with you. But it also included an understanding that life is often busy and she appreciated the effort of your travel.
Maybe it was the consequence of a simple life. But maybe it was more the result of a selfless life that was truly interested in others more than herself.
We also learned that Mrs. Harding had requested that I do her funeral service, so we have been making plans for Lesa and I to travel to NE Ohio for the service. The burden that Lesa senses for her family and for her father's health (who is still recovering from a stroke and open heart surgery) is apparent. And I am sure that the flow of memories, including canning peaches in Grandma's kitchen and running to the outhouse at the last second, will increase in the coming days. We are glad that our last visit to Ohio included a rare instance of what seemed to be coherant conversation with Grandma at the nursing home where she lived the past year or so.
As I have prayed this morning and read God's Word, the thoughts that come to my mind seem to focus on the fact of how a simple, yet faithful person who lived in a home without an indoor toilet until the late 1980's could have a profound impact on the world. As I have tried to come to a personal summary of my perception of this wonderful lady's legacy, it is wrapped up in the first 30 seconds of any conversation that anyone ever had with her. If you were to greet her with a hug and ask her how she was doing, within 5 seconds the conversation would ALWAYS be turned to the you...and she was genuinely interested.
She was always asking when we might be able to come and visit. But it was not in a way as other family members might ask. It was never laden with guilt for not being there more often, but you sensed a genuine desire to be with you. But it also included an understanding that life is often busy and she appreciated the effort of your travel.
Maybe it was the consequence of a simple life. But maybe it was more the result of a selfless life that was truly interested in others more than herself.
Monday, December 10, 2007
Finishing By New Years
I don't know about any of you, but I seem to struggle at finishing stuff. Things sound like good ideas, but life is so busy with good ideas that I often find it difficult to complete one good thing for something that may be perceived as better or more pressing.
A few weeks ago, one of my friends asked me to read a book. I really did want to read it...so when he gave it to me, I committed to do it. I did it for two reasons...I wanted to and I knew he would ask me about it. The same thing has happened with a guy in my church. I began a study some months ago...but stalled after chapter 30. The other day, this guy (who also was reading along with me) asked me if I had finished. I had to admit that I had stalled in the process, but was grateful for his challenge...(he also had stalled at around chapter 25). I re-started where I left off today.
This process has left me with two thoughts: (1) My New Year's resolutions for this year are to finish a few things before New Years and before I commit to start others. And (2) I need people to hold me accountable...even for some things that may seem trivial. And if I need to be reminded of some of these important things, maybe you do as well. Hope this helps...it does me good to confess occassionally.
A few weeks ago, one of my friends asked me to read a book. I really did want to read it...so when he gave it to me, I committed to do it. I did it for two reasons...I wanted to and I knew he would ask me about it. The same thing has happened with a guy in my church. I began a study some months ago...but stalled after chapter 30. The other day, this guy (who also was reading along with me) asked me if I had finished. I had to admit that I had stalled in the process, but was grateful for his challenge...(he also had stalled at around chapter 25). I re-started where I left off today.
This process has left me with two thoughts: (1) My New Year's resolutions for this year are to finish a few things before New Years and before I commit to start others. And (2) I need people to hold me accountable...even for some things that may seem trivial. And if I need to be reminded of some of these important things, maybe you do as well. Hope this helps...it does me good to confess occassionally.
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Life Begins
Tonight, I had the honor of visiting the newest person in our congregation. Little Sawyer was born this morning at around 10:30 a.m. So many times I (as a pastor) get to visit the sick and comfort the grieving. But for some reason, I was blessed today to see life the same day that the first earthly air was breathed. It sure was refreshing...and inspiring...and caused much reflection.
It is an incredible blessing from God to be a parent...4 times over. I met a grandma in the elevator who was visiting her 4th grandchild. The dad of the little guy I went to see just looked at me and grinned. Each of us had now had the privilege to parent 4 children of our own.
There is so much potential...and so much risk in living (whether you are the parent or the child). As I prayed over the parents and the child, it seemed that all I could focus on was an incredible need to see and sense God's hand in our lives, and my incredible desire for people (including myself) to know the awesome plan of God for our lives. Even though life in this atmosphere has just begun for one little guy, thank God we get the chance to put today behind us and begin again afresh tomorrow as we breathe in the new mercies of our heavenly Father.
It is an incredible blessing from God to be a parent...4 times over. I met a grandma in the elevator who was visiting her 4th grandchild. The dad of the little guy I went to see just looked at me and grinned. Each of us had now had the privilege to parent 4 children of our own.
There is so much potential...and so much risk in living (whether you are the parent or the child). As I prayed over the parents and the child, it seemed that all I could focus on was an incredible need to see and sense God's hand in our lives, and my incredible desire for people (including myself) to know the awesome plan of God for our lives. Even though life in this atmosphere has just begun for one little guy, thank God we get the chance to put today behind us and begin again afresh tomorrow as we breathe in the new mercies of our heavenly Father.
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